Gary Chapman published a book, The Five Love Languages several years ago that revolutionized my life. It helped me understand the people in my life and why they acted as they did.
Although most people enjoy most every expression of love, usually one speaks louder than the others. The five love languages Gary Chapman writes about are…
- Words of Affirmation
- Physical Touch
- Receiving Gifts
- Quality Time
- Acts of Service
It is natural to love others the way we feel loved, but if others have a different love language than our own, they won’t feel loved by us. My life was so impacted by this as a young wife and mother. I was surprised to find that my husband and each of my children all had different love languages.
Suddenly I understood why when I complimented one child, I would often hear from the other, “Didn’t I do a good job?” Her love language was words of affirmation. It now made sense why one of my daughters was always rubbing my arm, hugging, and wanting to snuggle. Her love language was physical touch. The third child felt particularly special when she received a pretty package. Her love language was gifts.
I immediately began seeing positive results as I began speaking the love language my husband and children related to best. It was a challenge for me to put aside my love language (acts of service) and begin speaking the love languages of my family, but the rewards were well worth it.
As I was reading God’s Word the other day, it occurred to me that God also has a love language. Jesus relayed that to us in John 14:15.
If we are wondering the depth of our love for our Savior, we can use our Gauge of Obedience to measure that love. Talk comes easy. If you heard, I love you often, but never saw that played out in actions, you would begin to doubt its truth.
It’s easy for us to say we love God, but do we obey the truth He has already revealed to us? Are we regularly in His Word learning new things He wants for us? We can’t obey if we don’t know what He requires.
As circumstances and seasons of life change, so can our love language. This sure keeps life interesting at best. If you can’t figure out someone’s love language, why not just ask them? I think they would be pleased that you care that much.
Human relationships will always present challenges, but God has made it clear what His love language is and the good thing is….He never changes! Hebrews 13:8 says, Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, and today, and for ever.
Let’s love lavishly today. Our family and friends need it. The lost and dying world we live in also needs to see what God’s love looks like. Let’s be doers of the Word and not hearers only, deceiving ourselves. (James 1:22)
Keep looking up,